


Work smarter, not harder

by noblet



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Ah yes bickering scientists, Alternate Universe - Different jobs, I'll take two, I'm not sure if I should tag this as crack or not, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-23
Updated: 2014-08-23
Packaged: 2018-02-14 08:48:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2185383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noblet/pseuds/noblet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternate Universe where everything's the same except they've switched jobs, Newt's the mathematician and Hermann's the biologist.</p><p>(Also Newt is smooth as hell? But we all knew that.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Work smarter, not harder

**Author's Note:**

> Tendo's an (un)offical wingman.
> 
> (I also like to imagine Hermann cutting into a Kaiju like one would cut into a steak, I don't know. Newt wrapped plastic wrap around him once since Hermann was being a total pain complaining about how he got kaiju blue on his vest one time.)

"Newton, if you don't mind getting your _horrendous_ chalk dust off of my specimens, and, if I may add, you have no business at all to be peering over my shoulder like that, please, return to your side," Hermann snapped. He felt like he was a broken record stuck on repeat. He could feel Newt's breath on his neck as he tried to calm down, jabbing his right shoulder up, hitting Newt square in the jaw as he smiled. Victory. 

Newt broke into laugher that Hermann was sure damaged his ear drums, cringing as Newt (finally!) backed away, taking out a Sharpie from his shirt pocket and marking a tally on the back of his hand with a villainous smile on his face.

"What are you _doing_ ," Hermann asked in an irked tone.

"Six!" The hyperactive man exclaimed, showing the number on his fingers."Sixth time you've said that to me today! Word for word!" Newton, who was trying to calm down but was failing terribly, exploded into a fit of giggles. He was a comedy character in a sitcom, keeled over with his hands on his knees as shoulders trembling like tree branches in the wind as he laughed. "You know the vain that pops in your neck whenever you're pissed is adorable, you know," Newt added with a slap to his knee.

"Newton, that's as romantic as it is unprofessional," Hermann responded in a dry tone.

Newt met Hermann's gaze, a look of steel and 'oh god so help me if murder was legal you would've been dead twelve years ago'. Newt immediately sobered up, getting out one last laugh as he stood up straight, cracking his neck.

"Doctor Geiszler, if you still have the slightest shred of respect for another human being's personal needs, you will go back to your side, where you cannot disturb me working for the rest of the night. Is that clear?" Hermann demanded, pointing a finger to the chalkboards across the room.

Newt nodded his head, only to state, "I don't understand how 'cutting up livers and arteries' make such a huuuuuge impact to whatever is helping us win this war. I mean, ooh, look at me I'm Hermann, I'm fifty years old and I like to relive my middle school years of dissecting frogs."

"Thirty-one", Hermann mumbles under his breath.

"Besides," Newt goes on. "Numbers is where the big money's at, dude," gesturing to the numerous equations and the like sprawled onto the board behind him, well, mostly numbers, excluding a drawing of seven eating nine that he'd made a week earlier.

"Well, while you're over there with your chicken scratch," Hermann retorts, "I will be over here gaining further knowledge of the _biology_ of what keeps **coming back to kill all of humanity**. Besides, Geiszler, dissection is a precise _art form_ , something that someone like you obviously will never get the gist of."

He picks up a scalpel, which clangs into the side of the table.

"Never understand art?!" Newt gapes. "Excuuuuse me, wise guy, did you see this drawing?" He points to seven. "And these!" He pointed to his arms, which were tattooed with different equations and problems in grey and black. He liked to refer to them as his "cheat sheets"

"Of course, my bad." Hermann rolls his eyes. Was that a smile? Newt was yet to clean his glasses after Hermann's last intestine mishap.

"Do I smell some sass coming from that intestine? Or is it you?" Newt prods.

"Newton if you would please be a little more professional, it would be greatly appr-"

"Hello gents! Having another dick-measuring contest I see." Tendo, who's standing in the doorframe, winks at Newt.

Hermann stiffens, turning his attention to the specimen laid out in front of him with newfound enthusiasm. Tendo walks into the lab with two bagles in one hand and two cups of coffee in the other. (How he was able to hold two cups in one hand was beyond Newt despite his six doctorates, he just assumed Tendo to be a wizard or something.)

"Hermann the German! The ol' Frog king. Hermann and his sermon. What's up H-Man?" Tendo asks, slapping Hermann on the back, and he stiffens further. "Where do I put the coffee?"

"Over... there." Hermann mumbles, waving a hand in the distinct direction of his desk. Tendo nods as Herman continues to mumble mindlessly to himself, placing the steaming mug on a kaiju coaster Newt had given him for Christmas. ("Since you're a total kaiju groupie", Newt claimed fondly as Hermann unwrapped his gift, five coasters and a build-it-yourself spaceship kit.) He places the plain bagel on a napkin next to the cup.

He makes his way over to Newt, dodging stacks of physics books that both lab partners took interest in reading, along with a few old Marvel comics. Newt sits on the first rung of his ladder with a bored look on his face and his palm glued to his cheek. "So, how's the math doing?" Tendo asks.

"Well, I think I might be getting a breakthrough, but with all the lack of sleep lately..." Newt taps his temple, eyebrows raised expectantly.

"Bah, who needs sleep." Tendo pushes the steaming mug into Newt's waiting hands.

He takes a sip. "Ahhh...an artificial alternative to sleep. Thanks, man."

"It's the main part of my job, isn't it?" Tendo grins. He hands Newt a bagel, the last one with sesame seeds. He always saved sesame seeds for Newt. He takes a gigantic bite that is half the bagel.

"Ah, yes, the whole 'Shatterdome Tech' thing is just a side job." Newt notes, his words muffled as he tries to chew.

Tendo laughs.

He leans in to Newt, and whispers so Hermann can't hear. "So, you gonna propose to Herms any time soon, or what?"

Newt almost shoves him away, but doesn't, he would get coffee all over himself, he swallows and takes a sip of the boiling liquid. "Ah.. shut up dude... I think he likes me though, he only yelled at me six times today," he whispers back, flashing the tallies on his hand with a Cheshire Cat grin.

Tendo's eyes widen in fake surprise. "Totally" he teased in mock tone.

=====

The next time Tendo walks into the lab without warning, Newt and Hermann are making out on the lab floor, and he turns around with the goofiest grin spread on his face, walking the opposite way he came from.

"They grow up so fast," he remarks to himself, wiping a fake tear from his cheek.


End file.
